Overheard At Work

tall – I see her before she sees me, the way her desk faces, you know.

short – Yeah.

tall – And it’s weird because, like whenever I’m coming toward her I see her suck in her stomach.

short – Oh, really?

tall – Totally. It’s not a lot or anything I mean, just, you notice. And I don’t know if it’s because she knows someone’s coming–or maybe because it’s me?–or if she’s, like, doing some kind of isometric workout at her desk and I just happen to be privy to it.

short – Isometrics, huh? How are you privy to isometric exercises?

tall – They’re… everyone knows. It’s not just me.

short – You do isometric exercises.

tall – No.

short – Yes you do. You sit at your desk flexing, I bet.

tall – Yeah right! Give you something to think about?

short – Oh, you give me plenty to think about.

tall – Dude!

short – What?

tall – Just. Not cool. Tone it back a little. I was talking about this girl.

short – I’m only kidding.

tall – Fine.

short – I think you should scare her and see what happens.

tall – Scare her? Like, scare her how?

short – Just jump out from around the corner next time and see if she sucks it in, and be staring right at her stomach so she knows you know.

tall – Right! That would totally ruin it.

short – Ruin it? Oh, you mean this little isometric romance you have working for you?

tall – Dude, whatever. I think she’s cute, that’s all.

short – Abdominal control! Moth to the flame…

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