The woman driving the convertible weighed down by carpet remnant logs piled taller than most SUVs is a woman capable of anything. Passing her by–as it is your fervent desire to drive faster than people-walking-on-sidewalk speed–you see that this woman has her windshield wipers on, and they’re on that motion blur setting that you used only once, when your hand hit the wiper controls by accident. People who use that speed can never be trusted, because there is a fine line between wanting to keep your windshield clear of rain and the desire to generate a sonic boom with the wipers strong enough to vaporize any rain within a yard from your windshield. And anyway, it’s not even raining. And what’s with the carpet logs? Crazy people commute too, see, so you should enjoy a momentary feeling of normalcy.